Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
should my penis look like a turkey
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
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