Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
