Fine. I'll sleep in my office
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
