I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
