I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize
