i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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