I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Randomize
