HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
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