thus making me awesome and them whores
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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