and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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