He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize