my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Randomize
