i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
She just used a chaser for red wine.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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