suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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