My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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