So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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