you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
