your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
