Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
