He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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