You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
