Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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