I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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