Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
even my farts smell like vagina
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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