I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
