College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
