He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize