Nicole vs. Life
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
