we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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