Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
