What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
