I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
