And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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