You smell like stripper and shame
Just cropdusted the office
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize
