Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
