This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
