sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize