but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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