And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
