I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
