I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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