hell yes lets make some ravioli
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
