If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Then you guys just all showered together...?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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