redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize