I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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