Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
