Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
