i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize