Have you finally orgasmed yet?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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