What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
